Peer Complaining?

So after I dropped Sophia off at preschool, I finally get to turn off Elmo and tune into a radio station...any station but Elmo.  And, what do I hear?  Holiday music!

I was thinking to myself, "REally? You got to be kidding!  I haven't have my turkey yet!!  And, Holiday music already?"  Then, I asked myself, "So, what if they are playing Holiday music before Thanksgiving?  Haven't I used to say that the Holiday season is too short and I get sad when the stations stop playing Holiday songs right after Christmas?  Isn't this great that I get to listen to these music a week longer than other years?" 

To be quite honest, "YES!"  I love that I can get to enjoy the Holidays a little longer this year.  So, then how come I was complaining?  Then I realized that I was doing an automatic response.  I have heard my friends around me complaining about how the retailers are pushing the Holiday season upon the comsumers to spend more.  And, so, here I am, just joining the crowd.  I coined it, peer complaining.  I find that so interesting!! I really have not real reasons of my own to complain except that is what everyone around me is doing...thus, the auto response!!! 

Hmmm...so, here is my question for you.  How often do you complain out of an auto response, just like everyone else is doing?  The next time when you catch yourself complaining, take a moment to find out if you are truly complaining about the issue or just doing what everyone else is doing! 

As for me, as soon as I realized that I don't really have an issue with the early Holiday season around me, I expressed my gratitude for the Holiday music and really enjoying it.  Especially during the early holiday travels that are showing up.  I really didn't mind sitting in the car longer because I have those beautiful music to accompany me.  And, it gave me such pleasure to see little Sophia, falling asleep listening to Bing Crosby's "White Christmas".  Now, that's such a beautiful way to start my Holiday.

Happy Holidays to all of you and may this Blessed time of the year visits you and stays with you a little longer.

Your Fearless Coach,
Coach Shirley

Keeping my chin up...

What do you do when you feel like the whole world has moved on and you are left behind?  What do you do when you feel like you are swimming with all your might to keep your chin up and not drown?  What do you do when you cannot find a life line to hang onto just for a moment to rest, to let go and know and TRUST that you will not drown?

So, today, I am here, as a fellow human being, having one of the toughest emotional day ever.  When I started this blog, I mentioned it is about my journey, learning to live in the moment, using my tools that I had learnt with a coach and now, a coach myself, teaching them to my clients.

At this moment, I am choosing to let go of those tools for a while and be in touch with myself, my emotions.  I had realized that I have kept them close to me and not allowing myself to share in this blog.  I wanted to come across as someone who has it together.  Well, I am giving myself permission to not have it all.  And, it is okay.

I had isolated myself from people who I used to call friends.  I was bitter and disappointed that they did not come to comfort me, even rescue me.  I was having expectations of what my friends should do for me and disappointed they did not.

So, what am I supposed to?  What if I have truly lost faith in myself, my friends and even God?  I was asked where was my responsibility to myself.  And, that got me really spiraling downwards because, I think there is some truth to it.  That I was not practicing being responsible to myself, to help myself and to be accountable to my life, my husband, my child.

I isolated myself from even my best friend, and not sharing with her my hurts and fears.  I don't her to worry and I don't want her judgments.  And, in the end, I am the one, judging myself the most. 

I know that I will not allow myself to stay where I am right now for too long.  I will dust myself off; choose one behavior that will support me in feeling back to being in control...lol...somewhat in control of my life.   And, be present and patient with my beautiful daughter.

Today, I don't have tips to share about living a more fearless life.  I am just here, vulnerable, open and embracing my humanity.  Because, this too, is part of my journey.  That's life.

Be fearless...

Coach Shirley

Farewell my body fats! Bon voyage!!!

While I was working out today, I had a really big, "Ah Ha!" moment that turned my views about workouts and exercising. And, before I go into my story, let me just share how proud I am of myself when I chose to work out at 3:30 pm in the afternoon, at home while baby Sophia is napping. This is a HUGE accomplisment and committment to myself. And, I saw it through.

So, back to the story. While I was working out, I realized that as I am consistently working out, the body fats that I am carrying with me today, will be gone. I mean, they will melt off of me and never to return, so help me God! When I realized that, I began to truly stay in the present and paid attention to my body. I mean, REALLY listened and tuned into how my body felt when I moved, kicked, and punched. I began to have true appreciation for my body and suddenly, I find myself in a state of gratitude. And, on some weird level, I was kind of like having a farewell party to the body fats that I am working off. I began to really enjoy my workout and before I knew it, I was done! And, I am looking forward to another one because I want to have another farewell party to the other body fats that did not get send off today.

So, what exactly am I trying to share here? Well, I changed my view about working out and I have turned it into an enjoyable party each time I work out. In my mind, I am having a sending off party. I can't wait to work out again. The image in my head, sending off bit by bit of my excess body fats that are unhealthy for me, is just sooo empowering to me! I no longer dread going to the gym, or looking for excuses to not go and work out.

I don't know if my "ah ha!" moment today is helpful at all, or if I am even making any sense to you. I am practicing letting go of judgments of myself and my view and I am willing to share.

If you understand what I am sharing here and you too, have come to some form of an epiphany moment, pleaaasseee, share with me. I would like to know that I am not the only one here. lol...thanks for hanging out with me!

Fearlessly,
Coach Shirley

Shirley's coming out, take 2!

Sorry everyone. The first attempt did not go as well. Here is my second attempt. Please ignore the first one! I am sharing some exciting news about myself. And, I am also offering one-time special which is time sensitive. So, go check it out! Enjoy! Coach Shirley

Shirley's coming out!

What is Shirley talking about???  Well, check out the video to find out!  Hurry...not much time left.

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Day 1 of trying new things

Yesterday was my first day of trying new things...well, made mango lassi (Mango shake)without a recipe! Yeah! That's a huge win for me as I don't make anything without a recipe. And, it turned out great! What an experience?!

I trusted my intuition to guide me with how much mango, yogurt and another new ingredient, Agave Nectar, to use!!  It was delicious!  The most significant aspect to this exercise is the opportunity to turn to my intuition and trust it to guide me.

I feel my trusting muscle has gotten a little stronger.  I feel great!  Can't wait to experience what new things/experiences I will choose today.

Keep you posted!  Now, what is your experience so far?  Do share!

Fearlessly,
Coach Shirley

What am I committed to?

Okay, so, it's Sunday night and here I am at the computer, wondering what am I willing to commit to doing for this coming week?  What Fearless principles would I like to work on?


To be very honest, Sunday night is kind of a funny night for me.  It's a night where I realized that the weekend is over and a new week is beginning.  I would take stock of what I had done the week before and assess areas where I had grown or shine.  Then, wondering what I can do in the next week to practice my Fearless muscles, and where I am willing to take a risk.


Now, my guts is crunching...lol!  Yes, after all these years of practicing and using the Fearless tools I had learnt and now, coaching my clients, I still feel the crunch in my guts whenever I decide to take a walk outside of my comfort zone...the wild side.


So, I am going to pick this...For this coming week, I am willing to practice trying out new things.  I know it may sound sooo trival, yet, I am willing to bet that for some, this is a challenge.  So, let's just try new things, new experiences, new places to eat, shop or even a new exercise class...oh...that sounds like an idea for me tomorrow!


Okay...so that's what I am willing to commit to this week...willingness to practice new things and new experiences.  I'll keep you posted!  Share some of yours if you are willing.


Have a Fearless week!!


Coach Shirley